under the light

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Monday, October 27, 2008

sometimes the drifting apart is really something that cannot be helped.
be it between colleagues, friends and even family.
yea... seems like anything is possible.
it is not that i am pessimistic.
i look at photos.
think of memories.
and smile.
at least it is wonderful that i have these memories,
as compared to those that have painful ones.
but me being me.
who totally love to wallow in self pity.
hmm.. actually..
its more like when i sit down there alone,
and this whole feeling of darkness engulfs me.
this strong urge to cry
and the searing ache.
haha.
it is contradicting.
i am such a weird dark person.
haha.
and that builds a wall.
i guess with that wall, it will be easier for me to breathe.
i know i have neglected alot of my friends.
and i really feel guilty.
and that's because there's this statement:
"as they say u got to give before what u are fated to recieve will come."
who's "they" who's that irritating "they"!
i feel like shouting at morals, enthics and the rules.
who is freakin hell is the 'they"!!!!
there isnt anyone like that alive.
there isnt anyone that noble, that pure, that forgiving.
its all a lie.
total bullshit.

7:27 PM

Fi- Fi-. C
to find a day where from then on
i would never need to lie again.

i really love vanilla.
for its straightforwardness

.mushiness with reality.

Irreplacable , unerasable memories.
June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 July 2010 September 2010 June 2011 July 2011 August 2011 November 2012