Wednesday, August 29, 2007
yeah man i really like my sunset blogskin but really cant see my photos if posted ah.
so i shall use back the old one till like i find anther nice sunset skin or like when this post with photos has disappeared.. haha.. yan complained it's too small ah
hahaha
rah rah is leaving sept 11 :(
have a safe trip darling
we had a wonderful dinner together today:)
i wrote to u 3 msgs i hope i have not rambled too much
hahha too tired ah
but i really mean watever i wrote
they may not flow coherently becuz things just keep coming and i had not enuf time to organize before i forget them ah so the sentences became not fluent and akward sounding ahhaha
i cant believe u are leaving so so soon
it was so unexpected
SARAH RAH RAH RAH
12:16 AM
Saturday, August 25, 2007
There was this day that i really doubted my existence.
and the worth of it.
4:08 PM
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DADDYYY
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DADDYYY
HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY PAPS!
:)
HAPPY BIRTHDAY papa...
WE
LOVE
YOU
DEARLY:)
I always believed that no matter hwi've done the wrong to this world or how the world has done wrong to me.
i would
i would always have my family
the closest and dearest to my hear.
no mattr ow hot tempered all of us are and how we tend to get carried away with notsonice sounding words and statements. ..
it would make a difference to me.
becuz
i noe in the whole wide world, universe
my family are the only ones, and will be the only ones
always and always forever there for me.
thank you my family.
11:07 PM
ah.
please tell me where's the 'talent' that anyone and everyone is supposed to have.
12:05 AM
Sunday, August 19, 2007
isn't amazing?
isn't amazing that we are reaching 20 soon?
i thought i would survive long.
i had always secretly thought that i would onyl live till 15.
i could not imagine the life at 18 19 or 20.
so.
life is just like that ya.
it goes on and on and on.
till an accident occurs and i am gone.
visualising my 30th birthday seems like the weirdest thing ever.
not that i am having sucidal thoughts.
just the exclaimation on the distance i have to continue walking.
how i wished i was quiet and sensible in the past.
when i meet old school mates. secondary or primary.
i feel ...
embarassed.
becuz the past images of weird me appears.
it really made me wonder how i survived in school
and whether i really had friends?
i never ever wanted to admit it.
maybe i was spoilt.
or just the plain lousy in character.
i hope i ahve improved.
improve.
improving.
10:04 AM
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
just listen.
8:26 PM
how charming can a singer get:)
8:21 PM
Monday, August 13, 2007
llalala.
success doesnt mean success
failure doesnt mean failure
what's there might not be there
what's not there might be there
11:45 PM
Thursday, August 09, 2007
taa daa daa
la la la
yes i got all my modules
but now i'm starting to be afraid abt my subjects
im not particularly good i maths eh
not to mention abt f maths i never ever took it before
shit shit shit
wat shit have i gotten my self into
5:32 PM
Sunday, August 05, 2007
sometimes i wished you would pay more attention.
sometimes i wished you weren't such a person.
sometimes i wished you would do stuff within your own means.
sometimes i wished you wouldnt neglect.
maybe i wished too much.
maybe i asked too much.
so
i shall leave.
oh.
and.
to the friend that spoke to me:)
charmie please
think about it carefully ya.
10:05 AM
Saturday, August 04, 2007
the times we spent together were always great
the sitting around
eating and eating and talking crap
those people are my friends
my good buddies
maybe maybe i do really have a problem
11:27 PM
Thursday, August 02, 2007
amazing isn't it?
amazing how fast a person can change.
sometimes i wish i wasnt human at all
it's such a amazing task how one can live till past 60 yrs. i doubt i can even live past 30.
life has proven itself to me, at least my life is difficult.
either that or
or
i am too useless.
and being huihui
obviously she totally hates the fact of being useless
even though it's true most of the time.
it's really really damn bloody irritating and hurting when u realise that someone you finally decide to trust and believe does something contradicting to their comments of themselves.
can anybody
anybody out there understand wat i mean.
dear diary
the bloody world
is bloody xu wei
bloody fake.
i am really damn exhausted.
really
exhaustion and fatigue is something not to be ignored.
therefore:)
i decided to not ignore it
i shall be the person that i want to be
i'm not gonna care if people say i'm spoilt or watever
wat'sthe point
when i'm easily agitated or hot tempered i tried to change
i changed
but it's not enuf
the amt of times i've swallowed my unhappy thoughts when someone does smthg
is oh my gawd.
but seems like some gets worse
or even feel that it is correct to swallow the whole bucket of bitterness in.
maybe i havent grown
maybe those think they have grown
wat i am facing in my family now
is it
is it imaginable by the others
the chaotic situation
the one after the another troubles, problems, unhappiness with each other
the twisted reality of them being relatives.
the pure yearning for my mum's homecooked meals
the pining for my dad's daily calls.
yes
every family has woes
i definitely dont expect anyone to understand or tolerate me due to the above reasons
but i need some one to listen to me seriously and not laugh them off
Thanks sarah
thank you for listening to me
11:45 PM