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Thursday, August 02, 2007

amazing isn't it?
amazing how fast a person can change.
sometimes i wish i wasnt human at all
it's such a amazing task how one can live till past 60 yrs. i doubt i can even live past 30.
life has proven itself to me, at least my life is difficult.
either that or
or
i am too useless.
and being huihui
obviously she totally hates the fact of being useless
even though it's true most of the time.

it's really really damn bloody irritating and hurting when u realise that someone you finally decide to trust and believe does something contradicting to their comments of themselves.
can anybody
anybody out there understand wat i mean.

dear diary
the bloody world
is bloody xu wei
bloody fake.

i am really damn exhausted.
really
exhaustion and fatigue is something not to be ignored.
therefore:)
i decided to not ignore it
i shall be the person that i want to be

i'm not gonna care if people say i'm spoilt or watever
wat'sthe point
when i'm easily agitated or hot tempered i tried to change
i changed
but it's not enuf

the amt of times i've swallowed my unhappy thoughts when someone does smthg
is oh my gawd.
but seems like some gets worse
or even feel that it is correct to swallow the whole bucket of bitterness in.

maybe i havent grown
maybe those think they have grown

wat i am facing in my family now
is it
is it imaginable by the others
the chaotic situation
the one after the another troubles, problems, unhappiness with each other
the twisted reality of them being relatives.
the pure yearning for my mum's homecooked meals
the pining for my dad's daily calls.

yes
every family has woes
i definitely dont expect anyone to understand or tolerate me due to the above reasons
but i need some one to listen to me seriously and not laugh them off

Thanks sarah
thank you for listening to me


11:45 PM


Fi- Fi-. C
to find a day where from then on
i would never need to lie again.

i really love vanilla.
for its straightforwardness

.mushiness with reality.

Irreplacable , unerasable memories.
June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 July 2010 September 2010 June 2011 July 2011 August 2011 November 2012

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