under the light

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Saturday, October 07, 2006

smile smile smile:)

hmm i realised it's quite difficult to write happy stuff..

because it is always not enough to be shared.
by the time i wanna write it down to remember,
it had already been shared between my friends and i...

hmm i realised it's quite easy to write sad stuff..

because it is not to be shared. or rather not wanted to be shared.
a minimal is suffocating overwhelming and upsetting.
so i'll always have the extra time and effort to write it down to remember.

cheerfulness is hard to achieve.
not just on the surface- smiling all the time laughing all the time.
but also underneath. the heart- is it bright light and smiling most of the time.

i feel that my happiest time was probably in pri 5. i realise in pri 5 i had felt really really blissful.

i was jus telling leslie that day: when we were young we wished we would grow up quickly, looking forward all the time not turning back.
now. we just wanna go all the way back. or. just rush thru life now and enter society. but it seems tht the working world is still not as blissful as primary 5. so. can time stop. i want it to stop. not that i have not enough. just that i want the real happy moments to remain. to stand still and not run furthur and furthur in my mind so far that i can no longer find it

it is not that i am not happy now.
it is just that happiness then felt so much more comfortable.

hmm.. i shouldnt brood on the past... look forward huihui.
look forward fellow mates.
look forward to the one and only aging process we'll go thru'
i missed treasuring the blissfuless then, so i must learn to cherish now .
who noes later in life i might want to turn back time and return to AGE: 17- 18

~ be able to tolerate what others cant, and become the top of the top of others.~

11:35 PM

Fi- Fi-. C
to find a day where from then on
i would never need to lie again.

i really love vanilla.
for its straightforwardness

.mushiness with reality.

Irreplacable , unerasable memories.
June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 July 2010 September 2010 June 2011 July 2011 August 2011 November 2012